Law

With that she goes and I look out of the window, I have a view of the city center, quite built up and nothing to see of the sea far and wide.

I will really miss that, I could see the ocean from my apartment in LA and I loved it ...

The ocean reminds me of him, because I was close to him.

I used to go surfing so often, but I haven't been on a board since three years ago.

Maybe I would do it again someday, because I loved it when the wind and the sun made me forget my worries for a moment ...

"So, you're equipped with that." Grace comes back, gets me out of my thoughts and puts a box on the bed. "Here's a new Sim card, Heather said you left yours with her." She hands me an envelope. "My number is on it, please call me." She comes to me and puts her hand on my crossed arms knows, all of this may not be what you imagined, but your mum is desperate. I can only guess how much John's death affected you, but Ana ... "she puts a hand under my chin and forces me to look at her." You are here. "She says quietly.

I cannot and will not answer anything and turn to the window again, a few minutes later I hear the door slam into the lock and I sink down on the bed.

I bury my face in my hands and sigh softly.

Then I get up, first make up my bed and unpack my bags, then I connect my laptop and stow away my books and files.

I carefully poke my head out of the door and look down the long hallway.

Where are they all?

Finally I find at least the toilets, which turn out to be clean and well-kept, and eat the sandwich that Grace left me there.

Already at 6 p.m. I am lying in my bed and staring at the ceiling.

What would John do now?

I smile faintly, he would make the best of the situation. He always said, no matter which starting place you start the competition from, it's up to you to make something of it.

When I have digested the clock change the next morning, I decide to go shopping, because I clearly do not have the right clothes for Irish standards.

Does it really rain here all the time?

I thought that was myth ...

Looking for something, I take a taxi and have me taken to a shopping center, which I find out is just three blocks from my dormitory. I stroll through the shops rather listlessly, but then change my mind and buy myself a pair of sweaters, cardigans and, above all, weatherproof shoes, because these are not as beautiful as my beloved high heels for the first time in my life I don't care.

Nobody knows me here, I can start over ...

On the way back I buy a winter jacket and something to eat, because my stomach is loud.

When I'm finally back in the dormitory, my roommates have apparently finished their lectures for today and I'm being stared at like an alien.

I first decide to bring my things to my room and then go to the communal kitchen to stow my purchases. Three young women are sitting at the table and look at me skeptically, I take a deep breath and go to them.

"Hello, I'm Anastasia Coleman." I put myself in front of "Ana." I add.

"Hello Ana, I'm Shannon and this is Olivia and Amber." The black-haired woman looks at me, but then smiles and the other two give me a short wave.

"Where can I put my things?" I ask in a friendly manner and point to my shopping bag.

“There is still one free compartment in the refrigerator and one is also free in the large closet next to it. Label it just to be safe. We're 7 here on the floor. ”Olivia winks at me and hands me a black pen.

“Thank you.” I start to label my purchases first and then stow them away and am glad that everything fits in.

"What are you studying?" Shannon turns to me and I decide to sit down with them for a moment.

What do I have to lose?

"Law." I finally answer.

“Well, that fits. So do we. ”Olivia is pleased. "How many more semesters do you have?"

"That started and then another 2." I explain with a shrug.

"Fortunately we are at the last." Olivia takes a deep breath, "Which university are you from?"

"UCLA." I realize that I can't relax in their presence, because they watch my every move and I see in their eyes that they are judging me before they even know me.

I admit I'm not much different from them ...

"Wow, from the States." Amber looks at me approvingly.

“At what age do you start studying?” Shannon now wants to know.

"I started when I was 20, but it varies depending on the situation." I explain to her.

"And how old are you?" She tilts her head.

"25, but I missed, let's say, the last 3 semesters." I admit.

"Aha." Shannon gives me a disparaging look.

"I'll go to my room and try to prepare for tomorrow." I apologize and escape to my room.

Well, we will definitely not be friends, but I should also concentrate on the essentials ... I think morosely and take my laptop to read something into the material.

The fact that I didn't get a single message on Facebook disappoints me a bit.

In fact, I fall asleep early and my cell phone wakes me up pretty roughly the next morning. I come up sleepily and need a moment to remember where I actually am. Then I remember and slowly get up. My feet touch the cold wooden floor and I close my eyes for a moment, a perfect way to start the day. I hate cold feet.

Then I pull a cardigan over my top and my hot pants and step into the hallway. Everything is still quiet and I start looking for the shared bathroom, when I finally find what I am looking for, I am pleased to see that no one has entered the plan so early in the morning.

So at least I have some peace ...

I sign in the whole week at 6:30 a.m. and enter the bathroom, which turns out to be really well-kept and clean, and it's more comfortable as expected, three sinks with large mirrors on one side, two showers on the other on the other side and everywhere small shelves and storage space in all imaginable colors.

I choose a bright turquoise shelf and stow my things in it as much as possible. When I stand in the shower and the hot water pelts down on me, I feel a little better, but there can be no question of good here ...

20 minutes later, I stand in front of the mirror a little indecisive and decide against my habit to just lightly put on make-up. I feel almost naked as I scurry across the hallway and put on dark blue jeans, a thick beige wool sweater and my new boots in my room.

I'm still undecided whether I really want to take this as an opportunity or whether I want to continue living my life as I've done so far.

But where does this take me?

'Jonathan wouldn't have wanted that for you ...' once again my mum's words echo in my head and I sigh. Now I'm several thousand kilometers away from her and yet she won't leave me alone.

I pack my laptop and my books, take a quick look around the room and then put on my coat before pulling the door shut and locking my door.