Nine

A lady must be at the location an hour earlier and they are required to wear ball gowns of their Nation’s national colors.

✾

The paper in my hand weighed like a ton of rocks.

Judging from the mix of intake and release of breaths inside the room, I can tell the locations varied greatly. I still haven’t looked up, I can’t tell much about how the others reacted. I’m still stuck staring at this piece of paper that would very well have an effect on my life. Or the remainder of it, I don’t think I would survive that long. No. Especially not here.

                Days after Silas mentioned that we will be doing some ‘charity’ work outside the gates, I studied some of the locations here in Cinco. Thanks to the library they so graciously provided, I was able to make myself knowledgeable of some of the places here. Like the places where there was an abundance of minerals, and places that not even a single human could survive in.

                Warily, I look up. That’s when I notice the colors.

                I didn’t notice it before because he was quick in handing them over to us. We were only thinking about ourselves and focusing on the task at hand that we didn’t notice it. The papers had colors on them, although it seemed faded, it had colors. Green and Silver. I scan the room quickly, noting how some of the consorts were smiling and relieved, and how some were pale and looked anxious. From my observation, only Holly and I had silver papers, the rest had green ones.

                I also note, that Holly looked like she would faint any minute, much like me.

                Silas sits at the center of the table, in front of him was a thick folder that seemed older than all of us. In it was papers that looked like it had seen better days, some were torn, some were wrinkling at the edges, and some looked like the words had already faded. He opens it and stops at a page, looking up at us with his eyes. “Well?”

                “No,” Holly’s soft voice broke the silence. “I can’t.”

                “I didn’t take you for a quitter, Holly.”

                Holly was at lost for words, not that she could reply though. It wasn’t a question, so she kept her mouth shut, her eyes going back into the paper in her hands once again. “What about the rest of you?”

                “I’m okay with mine,” Tarryn announces quickly. Glancing at Mariana in the process, “Let’s just get this over with.”

                Suzanne nods in agreement.

                “Me too, I’m alright with this.” Says Katya.

                Then they all look at me, waiting for me to speak.

                “No one can survive here.” I say. Even though what I really wanted to do is shout and tell him how unfair this was. He knew what papers he was giving us. He knew how it will turn out. Despite him denying that we were pawns, this seals the deal. He knew the death sentence he just gave me but still proceeded to ask questions like he expects me to just accept my fate.

                Did the past night not happen? Did he not look like he tried to kiss me then?

                What the hell is happening and why do I feel like he wishes for my death?

                “You’re overreacting,” Silas says, his eyes back to the folder, scanning the pages. “I studied these places and studied on how I can properly place each one of you so that you can all live, at least for three months, with an advantage.”

                I shook my head, this was not an advantage. He miscalculated. That’s all there is.

                “Aside from you two, the others aren’t complaining. Don’t you think if it’s wrong, the majority will call me out?” Silas argues, a smirk forming on his lips. I really don’t like him and I really don’t understand him, especially now.

                “Of course they won’t argue!” I whip my head towards Holly’s direction and my eyes widen. She was actually flipping out and losing her composure. This was the first time I saw her behaving like a woman that gets angry, instead of just a doll that does whatever she was told. “They won’t argue because what they got was okay! Much like mine, Amara’s must be a terrible place as well. Why can’t you understand this?”

                “All that I do, I think of the majority, the rest will agree. Right?”

                “And what about the rest? Just because the majority is alright doesn’t mean the minority should be forgotten!”

                And Silas smiles at that, I don’t know why. Instead he shrugs and continues reading.

                I bite the inside of my cheek at his dismissal. This is far from over. I won’t accept this without a fight.

                “Sit down, Holly. What’s decided is already decided. I’ve also informed your personal servants of the new arrangements. They’ve already prepared your bags and the few things that you will need. And now for the other matter at hand,” Silas closes the folder and it does so with a huge thump. “We can’t have them notice that you’re consorts. Aside from the possible dangers that it would bring, part of this test is making a name of your own.”

                The paper still felt like rocks in my hand.

                “We have to get rid of your necklaces.”

                Silence. Then gasps.

                We would all be noisy if we could talk without anyone asking us because this is just plain ridiculous at this point. Why did we even bother studying at the academe if the moment we stepped in here Silas would just throw away everything we know and are accustomed to?

                “I understand the confusion. However, I talked about this with some of my most trusted advisors and they told me this would be for everyone’s best interest. After all, if you’re nothing without your necklaces, I can’t say you’d be much of a Luna. The person who will be my Luna must be able to stand alone with or without the necklace.”

                I was shaking my so much that I wouldn’t be surprised if I end up with headaches. Silas probably saw my dilemma and the anger in my eyes because he felt sorry and asked me a question. “What?”

                “You’re serious, oh my goddess, you’re actually serious!” I felt something in me snap but I ignore it. The others were looking weirdly at me too, although Silas still has that signature smirk on his face. In fact he looked entertained with me. And that didn’t appease my anger, not one bit. “We can’t just go outside without our necklaces, how can you trace us? How can you even tell if we’re alive outside the gates? If this was all planned out by ‘advisors’ why is this the first time we heard about them? Not to mention, we all had papers and I’m sure I’m not the only one that noticed Mariana hasn’t received a paper of her own yet! What are you hiding and why can’t you tell it to us upfront. We deserve the truth since our lives are on. The. Line!”

                Not that they’re surprised by my outburst because there are times where I really had to speak my mind back at the academe but their surprise at this point is confusing me. They were still staring at me, or most importantly my face. I probably had a huge what sign at my forehead right now because I don’t get any of them. I just finished ranting about the unfairness of this all and they’re acting like I grew another head.

                My eyes.

                I flinch and turn around clasping my ear rapidly.

                Who was that? There was no one behind me.

                They’re looking at my eyes.

                I turn around to my other side, closing both my ears entirely.

                Where is the voice coming from?

                “It’s your wolf,” I was too busy freaking out from the voice literally inside of my head that I didn’t notice it was Silas who spoke this time. I was still holding onto my ears that I didn’t notice that I lacked of said body part. My ears disappeared and my mouth widened releasing a silent scream. Silas sighed and he looked at me like I was a child. “Your ears aren’t gone, they’re on top of your head.”

                I look at him like he’s crazy. He is.

                How could my ears be…on top of my head?

                I inch my hands closer and I feel it. I feel something. Something that feels like fur. On top of my head. Silas takes the folder and opens a drawer that was apparently under his part of the table. He then pulls a mirror from the drawer and starts walking up to me. I was still feeling the odd things that suddenly grew on top of my head to step away from him. “This is weird, I’ve heard of shifts that happen slowly, but never a shift that stops midway.”

                He hands me the mirror and I look at just what the others were looking at.

                My eyes were gold then, but it was more gold now. It looked like it was shining even.

                Glowing, was the right term.

                And on top of my head – was black furry ears.

                My mouth opened on their own, but due to the repressed teachings that I was taught back in the academe, I managed to turn the scream that wanted to escape my mouth into a small whimper.

                “From my calculations, this is all just timely. You all stopped taking suppressants that stops your wolf from showing up. Don’t be surprised if you experience some changes, especially whenever you’re overcome with extreme emotions, usually anger. That’s why from the lessons, I opted out of your martial arts lesson instead of the poison making one. It saves us time.”

                Silas goes back towards his seat but doesn’t sit down. He leans against it and crosses his arms against his chest. “All is decided either way. Now I’m not just asking. I’m ordering all of you to have your necklaces be removed. All the servants know how to do this, no worries. Now as for Mariana…”

                Silas looks at Tarryn, then at Mariana. “They were able to provide me with…information, that I needed. I appreciate things like that.

They give me something I want, I give them something they want. Just wolves helping fellow wolves.”

                I force myself to put the mirror down and look at both Tarryn and Mariana.

                What information?

✾

                The bag that supposedly carried all the things I needed for three months was the first thing I see inside my room. That and Karina, who was staring out by the windows. Standing at the place I just was a few moments ago, staring at the body. “Silas knows what’s best for us, Lady Amara. It would be better to just listen.” 

                I don’t tell her anything. I don’t tell her that our fate is in our hands.

                That we ourselves are the only people that knows what’s best for us.

                Karina turned around, and that’s when I see the screwdriver she was holding, and a small pin.

                “I’m really sorry, Lady Amara, but we must remove it.”

                I’m about to ask what the small pin was for, but Karina lounged at me and I got my answer.

                It wasn’t just a pin, it was a small syringe. I was asleep in an instant.

✾

                The moment I woke up, I wasn’t inside my room anymore.

                In fact I didn’t know where I was. It looked like a small cave, and it was extremely humid inside. This is one of the first time that I actually woke up due to the heat. A ring of sweat forming on my back. I took notice that I also wasn’t wearing clothes that I was used to. I was dressed in common folk clothes, I was also in grime and filth. I didn’t look like a consort. I was dressed in rags and looked like I lived in it.

                I place my hand against my neck instinctively, not at all surprised that my necklace was gone.

                I couldn’t tell what time it is or how long I was asleep inside the cave, I can see the light that leads towards the entrance of the cave. Slowly, I stand up and dust myself off the dirt inside the cave. Not that I did much, I still looked pretty much disgusting. I don’t know where the others are, I don’t know where Karina is. I don’t even know how far I am from the palace. I sigh and grab my bag, a small piece of paper tucked inside one of the pockets. I slowly take it, sweat dripping down on my neck.

                I hold onto it and walk towards the entrance. From the heat I could tell it was about afternoon, from where I was I could see a dilapidated town full of small houses that looked like wind can easily blow them down. I felt my head throbbing. This was really it. I was outside. The real world. This was happening.

                I’m at the Torrids. This used to Sem, from what I read in my books. A land that was so dry most crops die before they even have a chance to bloom. Rain comes in quick drops, and even if there was it only does so a few times per month. I raise the paper up and check on the paper on my bag.

                It had the word Amara written on the front.

                I didn’t know whose handwriting it was, it looked like it was written in haste, and some of the letters even had double loops in them. I flip it over and I see the message. Written in big bold black letters are the words; YOU ARE A WOLF. YOU CANNOT BE CAGED.